If you have elderly parents, you may have concerns about their plans for their golden years. Talking about end-of-life care and financial arrangements is never easy, especially when adult children address these issues with their parents.
Below is some helpful information for those needing to have “the talk” with their parents.
Choose your time carefully
With the winter holidays just ahead, if you are getting together with your parents, now is a good time to plan what you would like to say to them about estate planning. No one is suggesting you discuss things over the holiday dinner, but find a spare moment to share a cup or coffee or a beer and bring up the topic.
One way to do it is by asking for advice on your own estate plan, e.g., “What plans do you and mom have in place for later?” Their response will give you an idea about how willing they are to share their estate plans with you.
Understand there may be pushback
Sometimes, those most in need of care options are the last to reach out because they are already experiencing dementia and are not thinking clearly enough to realize they need help. If such is the case with your elderly parents, be prepared for them to dig their heels in and perhaps get indignant. It’s all part of the process.
Present them with options
Elderly parents may be overwhelmed by the life changes they face. Help them to see the viable choices they have, like:
- Aging in place – Some people live out their lives at home after some modifications are made
- Assisted living centers – These allow for graceful living in stages of care.
- Move in with a loved one – Think mother-in-law cottages, etc.
Giving them options to choose helps them retain their autonomy during the estate planning process. An experienced attorney can also provide guidance that may be helpful.